The REAL Mainstream Lifestyle No one Wants to Admit

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“Why aren’t you married?” , “Why have you never been married?”, “Why are you single?”, “Aren’t you lonely?”, “What’s wrong with you?”…………………………………..

I feel like I’ve been married four times!  I couldn’t imagine how hellified it would have been had I followed through with those engagements.  I knew I wouldn’t when I was wearing the ring(s).  If you turn down a proposal, you’re basically breaking up.  I was saying yes to a  promise to think about marriage in the future ~ A Temporary committed relationship with shiny objects I couldn’t care less about, but was told I should. Obviously the guys bought into this universal assumption that just isn’t true.  I’m heterosexual, yes, but it doesn’t make it true for me, so there’s got to be others right?  I didn’t think so either, but there are many others….many who didn’t realize that’s not what they wanted until they were knee deep in soccer games, and motherhood, in Happyland Suburbia, USA..

I’m single by CHOICE.   I see guys here and there, but I’ve been there and done the whole intense physical attraction, mad love, crazy addictive butterflies, mind blowing sex, and the cycle would go on and on and on…  I can have purely platonic friendships with men, and I can have purely non-committed sexual “friendships” with guys, and then I can have MYSELF, and my own thoughts, views, creative endeavors and not have to consider another person’s wants, needs, or irritating habits and whiny spoiled brat behavior.  I love my singlehood and will fight for that freedom as hard as I will my right to bear arms, exercise free speech, and tolerate no tyrants in this everchanging world.

Loneliness sucks.  I’ve felt it before.  It was my third engagement, and he was the first emotionally, then physically abusive guy I’d gotten involved with.  It never starts out that way, I learned first hand, in fact, quite the opposite.  They lure you in romantically and it’s a helluva ride until you’re on the downswing… OUCH… After a while, that becomes what the heart denies… Next thing you know you’ve got blood running down your face after his first closed fist meets your nose.   Aside from that, it was horrible to be laying in bed next to someone who wasn’t “there’.. He was physically present, but emotionally absent.. Now THAT’S some loneliness I never want to feel again…And as a happily single chick, I never have….

The pros and cons have been narrowed down to an abundance of overflowing pros.  They never cease to reinforce my commitment to autonomy and being single, and if it helps someone suffering the heartache of a breakup, then awesome.  I’ve had many of those, and they suck it BIG TIME.  None of those either..See, there are more reasons to be single already, and I’m just getting started……… BRB…. This guy friend of mine loves to bring dinner over a few times a week……just for my company….

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